Living in Spain with Fax Machines and Bureaucrats

Expats living in Spain will quickly become aware of how much Spanish officials adore reams of paper and boxes of rubber stamps. Well, closely, allied to this obsession is the heady adoration of that once wonderful, but now antiquated technology of the past - the fax machine. Yes, I have to admit that I used to be fascinated by the thought that a piece of paper could be put into one of these machines in London and yet, almost in real time, it would pop out from another very similar machine in New York. If you think about it, it really is a very clever process.

However, times have moved on and we now have the Internet, emails and text messages, and somehow the humble fax machine looks like something rapidly destined for a museum of 1970’s technology - or is it?

Since moving to Spain I have come to realise that it is essential to have a fax machine at home or at least to have ready access to one. Its use is still demanded by the many faceless officials oiling the wheels of the Spanish bureaucratic machine. Without it, the newly arrived expat will undoubtedly face a life of complete misery and degradation. “What, you don’t have a fax machine?” I can hear the bureaucrats spluttering, as they tuck into their mid-morning breakfast at their desks, a ham filled bocadillo in one hand and mobile phone in the other.

A few days ago I decided to change the bank that I use to pay one of my direct debits. My initial thoughts of a quick phone call to the company concerned to change the bank details proved not to be the case. Several hours later I am still trying to achieve what would be, in the UK, a very simple procedure. My initial telephone call earlier this morning was greeted with astonishment that I should even want to consider the process of changing a bank, followed by a request that I make another request, this time by fax, confirming what I wanted to do and giving the necessary account details. Surely I could send an email? No, it had to be a fax, Maria, the lady at the end of the phone insisted politely.

My hastily typed and faxed letter was then followed up by a return phone call from Maria. Did I really want to change the bank details? Yes, I confirmed. Well, in that case, would I send a send a letter or a document from the new bank confirming my account details? This, of course, had to be sent to Maria by fax.

Once again, I plugged in the fax machine, and this time sent another letter, together with a letter from the new bank confirming the account details. This was followed by another phone call from Maria, who was now sounding a little more aggressive, complaining that although she had received my letter and the letter from the bank - the faxed letter had omitted to include my full name and fiscal number. Would I send them another letter, preferably the front page of my cheque book, which would include both my name and account details - once again, by fax. Oh, and by the way, could I fax them a copy of my passport and residencia certificate at the same time?

Three hours later, and as I type this, a simple process that should have been dealt with in a few minutes, is still grinding on. Once again, Spanish bureaucracy is beginning to wear me down and Maria will be spending all her day changing my one direct debit and I won’t get any writing done. Maybe I won’t change banks after all!

About the author: Barrie Mahoney was a teacher, head teacher and school inspector in the UK, as well as a reporter in Spain, before moving to the Canary Islands as a newspaper editor. He is still enjoying life in the sun as a writer and author.

If you enjoyed this article, take a look at Barrie’s website: http://www.barriemahoney.com/ or read his latest novel, ‘Journeys and Jigsaws’ (ISBN: 9781843865384).

© Barrie Mahoney


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